Archives for the 'meat' tag
Quick Bites
After an unannounced, unintended, and unacceptable two-week absence, Crispy is back.
British taxpayers buy jihadi cleric’s kebab and Coke. In return, he rants against the West in short news documentary titled Jihadi Milkshake. [The Sun]
Think one-million people dead of starvation during its government-induced famine in the 1990s was bad? It was. But get ready for worse, as North Korea is cracking down on free-market commerce. “[H]alf the calories consumed in North Korea now come from food bought in private markets” that soon won’t exist. [MSNBC]
Government restrictions on fishing freeze out new entrants, resulting in a graying and shrinking population of fishermen in New England. (Though not mentioned in the article, it also results in a bunch of people complaining about how the great majority of the fish consumed in this country come from abroad. Gee. Wonder why.) [MNSBC]
Former vegetarians lash out at the practice after realizing they can “hav[e] their burgers without sacrificing the moral high ground.” [Newsweek]
Liverpudlian tike busted for selling chips at school is growing “sign of pupil disgruntlement over school meal reforms spearheaded by TV chef Jamie Oliver.” [DM]
Meat for me, but not for thee
Lord Stern of Brentford, the UK’s climate chief, hath spoken. And he sayeth, “‘Tis not meet for thee meat to eat, for you should not have it. But I have meat and I can it eat, so step aside you’re noshing on my roast and polluting the planet.” Lord Stern is, of course, not a vegetarian. He is , however, an economist.
Whenever I think I should, or in fact do, reduce my meat consumption, something like this comes out. Then I regret having contributed to both global warming and general idiocy by having had beans for dinner, and I go buy a steak ( which, incidentally, is supposed to be a deal now.)
Lord Stern, this steak’s for you!
“Some hae meat and cannae eat
Some would eat that want it
But we hae meat and we can eat
Sae let the Lord be thankit!”
HT: L. Coyle.
A New One
I thought I had heard all varieties of eating weirdness: “vegetarians” who eat poultry and fish, cheesatarians, etc. But this doesn’t make any sense.
Mrs. Kuhl and her BFFs have been taking a series of wine-tasting classes where they get together, drink wine, giggle, gossip about boys, talk about tampons — you know, the stuff chicks do. At last night’s class, a rogue male was present and the ladies struck up a running conversation. The instructor pairs the wine with food, and with one particular vintage he served pepperoni, which the male refused. When asked why, he replied that he only ate meat that wasn’t prey.
When pressed, the male said he once read a tale of high-seas cannibalism featuring shipwreck and pirates, which the Juris Doctorates among the group realized was a mongrelized version of Regina v Dudley and Stephens. How this rationalized his eating habits was unclear.
Was he serious? I asked Mrs. Kuhl. He only eats meat that isn’t prey. How does that work? He dines exclusively on wolves and alligators? The Burger2? Wife said the man went on to describe an incident in which he witnessed a chicken peck a frog to death, thereby justifying his consumption of chicken. OK, but something still eats the chicken, therefore it’s still prey. Does he eat the species as punishment for the aggression of an individual?
After trying to bend my mind around that I eventually returned to my time-tested conclusion about the world: People are crazy.
Photo courtesy of Heather.
Today’s Meat Moment of Zen
Jan Svankmajer’s “Meat Love” animation from 1989.
Via meatpaper
Meat: You’re Right In Liking It
This, and many more fabulous 1940s images from the American Meat Institute here.
Deer Prudence
With the solstice upon us, so too comes that modern newspaper staple, the tale of hunters-donating-to-soup-kitchens:
As its name suggest, the Oxford-based charity [Hunt to Feed] donates venison to the hungry by way of the Connecticut Food Bank, according to its president, Joe Tucker, also of Oxford.
“Each deer produces 40 to 50 pounds of deer meat,” he said. The first year we donated 700 pounds of venison. Last year it was 1,250 pounds. And this year, we’re on track to go over a ton.”
While I have nothing but respect for someone who slays so that others may sup, these kinds of stories tend toward the formulaic, right down to the obligatory snarl from an anti-hunting spokesperson:
“I think that this gesture is meant to build the image of the weapons enthusiasts,” said Priscilla Feral, president of the Darien-based Friends of Animals. “I see it differently. They’re not hunting to feed families. They’re out for trophies. The problem of hungry people is solved with jobs, not deer flesh.”
It helps the joke if you understand that Oxford, HQ for the hunters’ group, is a middle-class town in CT’s blue-collar Naugatuck River Valley, while Ms. Feral’s Darien is the second richest town in America. Regardless, these antipodal sentiments bring to mind another story from Tuesday, in which we learn that wild boars have pierced Berlin’s borders more expertly than the Red Army:
The hairy beast was one of thousands of wild boars that have discovered the charms of urban living in Germany’s leafy capital city. When the creature trotted out of rush-hour traffic one morning last month to root around the flower store, Ms. Klose’s first thought was: “That is one ugly dog.”
After a second glance, Ms. Klose phoned the police for safety — and a local tabloid for publicity. The police called in Matthias Eggert, one of a crack band of hunters with license to kill hogs in urban areas. But Mr. Eggert’s plan to dispatch the boar appalled Ms. Klose. The hunter says the tabloid reporter brandished a camera and warned him he’d have the whole of Berlin on his case if he pulled the trigger. Mr. Eggert sensed a PR debacle, so he phoned around until he found an animal sanctuary 40 miles from Berlin that granted the boar asylum and named the swine “Amanda.”
The story goes on to illustrate the sympathy the donuts citizens feel for the boars, with Mr. Eggert alone expressing that Hunnish vigor we’ve come to know and love:
“We should just gather hunters at the these feeding sites, make the civilians stand aside, and feed the swine with lead.”
What’s interesting about this story is the complete absence of the obvious final solution for bacon on the hoof. Did the writer not think to ask about what was done with the dead boars? Are Berlin’s food kitchens well stocked without them or are there proscriptions against donating the meat? I would imagine the strongest case for boar butchery would be made by appealing to the need of Berlin’s less fortunate — but it’s never addressed.
Beatles’s “Dear Prudence” here. Siouxsie cover here.
Hardcore Meat Photography
Flickr groups are a wonderful thing, allowing users to share images related to a theme and often hosting some excellent discussions. There’s everything from the wacky Stick Figures in Peril group, to the narcissistically inspirational Wardrobe Remix, to the genuinely artistic, like Low Light Lowlife.
So I was happy to discover the Hardcore Meat Photography group. It’s name is a send-up of a notoriously snooty Flickr group called Hardcore Street Photography, but the group is no joke to its 193 members. With 350 photos of different kinds of meat they almost have enough for a calendar. Check it out, and by all means contribute. Tell ‘em Crispy sent you.
Crispy Podcast Episode 6
In this episode of our surprisingly weekly podcast, we chat with Scott Gold, the author of the recently published book, The Shameless Carnivore: A Manifesto for Meat Lovers. Aside from exploring everything meat-related—from the practicalities to the spiritual aspects—Scott engaged in a month of meat, in which he ate 31 kinds of meat in as many days. This interview took place during this year’s Duckathlon and was recorded on a street in New York City, so pardon the audio. It’s worth putting up with it, though.
We hope you enjoy this episode and that you’ll tell us what you think. If you like what you hear, please subscribe to the show for free. You can grab the RSS feed or click here to subscribe in iTunes. That way you’ll get it every “week.”
PETA Acts Not Dumb
Yesterday PETA launched a $1 million contest to convince some mad scientist to come up with a way to create meat in a lab setting that “would mimic flesh and could be cooked and eaten”–what it’s calling “in vitro meat.” PETA claims the contest is a way to advance its so-called anti-cruelty agenda, stop harming the environment, etc.
I think it’s really just an admission by the group of what carnivores and omnivores have always known: meat tastes good. So good that it seems the overwhelming majority of manufactured vegetarian food–plant life that didn’t grow from the ground (or ocean)–serves little more than to provide calories that mimic the taste of meat.
Alas, I could go on about how awful PETA really is, but I must instead respond to a vegan friend, who wrote me this morning, regarding the PETA contest, with this challenge:
I dare you to put up a positive blog post one of these days about vegetarians or vegans and something they do or eat.
So here goes: this contest is a great idea. Bravo to PETA. This is exactly the sort of thing groups like PETA should have been doing all along. Not terrorizing or suing or intimidating what should be free choices made by peace-loving meat eaters. But putting their money where their breasts mouths are in order to effect voluntary consumer change. All while helping vegetarians eat better tasting food.
One final note… I wonder if the chicken breast cutlet photo PETA used to announce the contest comes from chickens killed specifically for its campaign, or whether they nabbed the photo from a provider like Corbis. Just wondering.
Can a Bacon Mag Be Far Off?
Booze mags abound. Imbibe. Modern Drunkard. Stuff about wine. Food mags are dime a dozen, too. But never has there been a magazine solely devoted to meat. Until now, reports the Washington Post.
…Meatpaper is not the kind of practical magazine that’s likely to publish a story called “10 Hot New BBQ Tips for Sizzlin’ Summer Cookouts!!” It’s the kind of arty, cheeky, ironic magazine that just published a story called “Sweat Sock: The Other White Meat.”
Meatpaper isn’t really about meat, it’s about “the idea of meat,” the editors explained in the first issue last fall. “Half the people who pick up Meatpaper assume it’s some kind of vegan hate letter addressed to their salami sandwich. The other half wonder if we’re subsidized by the National Cattlemen’s Beef Association. That’s how we know we’re on to something.”
I would follow up that quote by noting that they are on to something, but I shouldn’t, unless I put it in quotes, since that’s what the Post wrote. More here. Meatpaper online (meatweb?) here.
Urbanite Baltimore calls the most recent issue of Meatpaper “a smorgasbord of carnivorous delights” here.
